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HELP! I’m in My 40’s and Just Found Out I Am Pregnant

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HELP! I’m in My 40’s and Just Found Out I Am Pregnant

Last updated Aug 3, 2021 | Adoptive Family Resources, Birth Mother Resources | 0 comments

If you are in your 40s and just got surprised with an unplanned pregnancy, you might be wondering what options you might have.

Adoption is sometimes the perfect option for families who are already established or who are looking towards retirement and don’t wish to raise another child.

We normally think of women in their teens or early 20’s who are looking to place a baby for adoption, but age is not a factor and we have helped many expectant moms of all ages make the best decision for the future of everyone.  Case by case the “best decision” is different and you should never feel coerced or pressured.

Here are some of the life situations and factors that many expectant moms in their 40s may be considering:

  1. You have older children and life and family seems to already be full and complete

    Many families have already settled into what life and retirement and college, etc… are going to look like and the idea of starting again seems daunting and like maybe it will take away from the time and attention that is needed to properly continue building and cultivating relationships and connection with their kids.  This is often a very thoughtful and kind decision that takes a tremendous amount of self awareness and forethought and may be a deciding factor for why adoption is the best choice.
  2. Your career and responsibilities are only going to demand more time and attention in the future

    Many parents already don’t feel like they can devote enough of their life to spending time investing into the kids they already have.  The idea of adding more and stretching themselves even further, seems impossible and potentially unfair to the family unit.  The average cost of raising a child to the age of 18 is somewhere around $233,000.  This is a real factor in deciding if a late addition to the family is feasible and responsible to the commitments that many parents already have made.
  3. You simply don’t want to have a child at this phase of life.

    There is zero shame in a woman deciding that her days of diapers and erratic sleep are over.  Many women feel this way and it is completely normal and reasonable.  It is absolutely OK to acknowledge those feelings and those emotions are commonplace for an unplanned pregnancy in your 40s.

  4. You have always felt like being a mom is not your thing.

    Reasons 1-3 all assume that you are already a mom and we realize that lots of women who are not moms have an unplanned pregnancy after 40.  Deciding that motherhood is not something that you have ever felt is for you is more common than talked about.  It is completely natural and normal to listen to your heart when it comes to deciding if being a mom is one of your callings.  An abortion seems to be a more commonplace choice for women who are 40 years or older, but adoption can be really great option and we believe that it is worth a consultation or exploring.

If you or a loved one is 40+ or beyond, just know that age is not a factor and a specialist adoption attorney like Tammi Driver Law may be the perfect solution for you.  Adoption agencies seem to offer services that you may not need.  The list of support services offered from a standard adoption agency are usually geared towards expectant moms who are in their teens and 20’s and need lots and lots of extra wraparound support.  If you need that sort of customized help, we have an amazing full service adoption agency we can coordinate with.  If you are like many expectant moms experiencing an unplanned pregnancy in their 40’s or beyond, an adoption attorney like Tammi Driver who has a direct personal connection with her clients, may be your perfect solution.

Call 727-800-6681 today to schedule a consult to speak to Tammi Driver directly and see if adoption is your best option.  

Tammi is known for her extremely personalized client customer service and will make sure you are not just handed off.  If you choose to work with Tammi, she wants you to have her cell number so she can be available to answer your questions.